Andy's Antics

Crystal: My mom is going into the hospital today
Andy: what for?
Crystal: They found a mass on her uterus
Andy: They found a Mastodon on her uterus?!? She should get that checked out.

Andy: I’m sure he is embarrassed to be your friend
Me: Why?
Andy: you don’t know how to work clothes and you probably forget to pull your underwear down when you go to the bathroom.
Me: I do not.
Andy: you need one of those collars so you don’t chew your stitches.

Have you seen my hot dog?

We were in the store Hot Topic looking for a AC/DC belt buckle for Arwed (the new foreigner who is German/Australian really wanted one) and there was a shirt that had a wiener dog on the front and said “Have you seen my wiener” Nicolo turned around and loudly asked “have you seen my wiener?, what does that mean?” All the scary pierced, blue haired scary people were laughing so hard at my poor little Italian golfer…I shuffled him out as fast as I could and asked him no longer to talk.

Amy Lubinski is Boot Free!

Things that Amy can do now that the boot has been removed, because no one likes a cripple..

Kick (preferably ‘it’)
Run
Pedal
Dance
Knee Board
Pilates
Free Style Hip Hop
Cage Train
Knife Fight
Build a Fort
Steal
Rock Climb
Roller Skate
Karate
Skateboard
Mad Licks on the Guitar
Killer Jumps on her bike
Walk without a hobble.
Run barefoot in the sand with her lover
Surf
Dance Like a Russian

Glad to have you back in the standing upright human race…now go find your left shoes.